Here are six
types of listening, starting with basic discrimination of sounds and ending in
deep communication.
Discriminative
listening
Discriminative
listening is the most basic type of listening, whereby the difference between
difference sounds is identified. If you cannot hear differences, then you cannot
make sense of the meaning that is expressed by such differences.
We learn to
discriminate between sounds within our own language early, and later are unable
to discriminate between the phonemes of other languages. This is one reason why
a person from one country finds it difficult to speak another language
perfectly, as they are unable distinguish the subtle sounds that are required
in that language.
Likewise, a
person who cannot hear the subtleties of emotional variation in another
person's voice will be less likely to be able to discern the emotions the other
person is experiencing.
Listening is
a visual as well as auditory act, as we communicate much through body language. We thus
also need to be able to discriminate between muscle and skeletal movements that
signify different meanings.
The next
step beyond discriminating between different sound and sights is to make sense
of them. To comprehend the meaning requires first having a lexicon of words at
our fingertips and also all rules of grammar and syntax by which we can
understand what others are saying.
The same is
true, of course, for the visual components of communication, and an
understanding of body language helps us understand what the other person is
really meaning.
In
communication, some words are more important and some less so, and
comprehension often benefits from extraction of key facts and items from a long
spiel.
Comprehension
listening is also known as content listening, informative
listening and full listening.
Critical
listening is listening in order to evaluate and judge, forming opinion about
what is being said. Judgment includes assessing strengths and weaknesses,
agreement and approval.
This form of
listening requires significant real-time cognitive effort as the listener
analyzes what is being said, relating it to existing knowledge and rules,
whilst simultaneously listening to the ongoing words from the speaker.
Biased
listening happens when the person hears only what they want to hear, typically
misinterpreting what the other person says based on the stereotypes and other
biases that they have. Such biased listening is often very evaluative in
nature.
In
evaluative listening, or critical listening, we make judgments about
what the other person is saying. We seek to assess the truth of what is being
said. We also judge what they say against our values, assessing
them as good or bad, worthy or unworthy.
Evaluative
listening is particularly pertinent when the other person is trying to persuade
us, perhaps to change our behavior and maybe even to change our beliefs. Within
this, we also discriminate between subtleties of language and comprehend the
inner meaning of what is said. Typically also we weigh up the pros and cons of
an argument, determining whether it makes sense logically as well as whether it
is helpful to us.
Evaluative
listening is also called critical, judgmental or interpretive listening.
In
appreciative listening, we seek certain information which will appreciate, for
example that which helps meet our needs and goals. We use
appreciative listening when we are listening to good music, poetry or maybe
even the stirring words of a great leader.
In
sympathetic listening we care about the other person and show this concern in
the way we pay close attention and express our sorrow for their ills and
happiness at their joys.
When we
listen empathetically, we go
beyond sympathy to seek a truer understand how others are feeling. This
requires excellent discrimination and close attention to the nuances of
emotional signals. When we are being truly empathetic, we actually feel what
they are feeling.
In order to
get others to expose these deep parts of themselves to us, we also need to
demonstrate our empathy in our demeanor towards them, asking sensitively and in
a way that encourages self-disclosure.
In
therapeutic listening, the listener has a purpose of not only empathizing with
the speaker but also to use this deep connection in order to help the speaker
understand, change or develop in some way.
This not
only happens when you go to see a therapist but also in many social situations,
where friends and family seek to both diagnose problems from listening and also
to help the speaker cure themselves, perhaps by some cathartic process. This
also happens in work situations, where managers, HR people, trainers and
coaches seek to help employees learn and develop.
The word
'dialogue' stems from the Greek words 'dia', meaning 'through' and 'logos'
meaning 'words'. Thus dialogic listening mean learning through conversation and
an engaged interchange of ideas and information in which we actively seek to
learn more about the person and how they think.
Dialogic
listening is sometimes known as 'relational listening'.
Sometimes
the most important factor in listening is in order to develop or sustain a
relationship. This is why lovers talk for hours and attend closely to what each
other has to say when the same words from someone else would seem to be rather
boring.
Relationship
listening is also important in areas such as negotiation and sales, where it is
helpful if the other person likes you and trusts you.
